Written by BKO Founder Dana Jacoviello
Happiness is a funny thing. It isn’t a science. There isn’t any one thing that constitutes what makes a person happy. It is a plethora of things working together. It can be family, friends, good career, money, success, children, hobbies. and so on and so forth.
It is different for everybody. The one thing that remains constant for all of us is that it is not attainable through another person or thing. Let me clarify that statement. I am not saying people or things do not make us happy. I am stating that you should not look to anybody for happiness when you are unhappy. Do not expect someone to change your life until you change it first. Once you are happy with yourself and your life, then you can find even greater happiness.
Happiness starts within yourself and the rest, that comes after. Though many things make us happy, we can’t rely on them forever. That is only temporary. If you are unhappy with yourself and your life, it will only be a mirage of happiness. You think you feel it until it goes away when that person or thing is no longer working. It isn’t working for a reason.
It is easily compared to running away from your problems thinking they will not catch up to you. It will continue to chase you. Until you face your obstacle, it only hides until it rears its ugly head. You have to own it and embrace it first. Trust me on that statement…
To find peace, you must first find it in your heart. You can aim high or low. Happiness is not measured on a scale. What makes us ultimately happy is a combination of both the little and big things.
Do not fake it until you make it. This only puts us in a position to stay stuck and forget what real happiness feels like. I used to be a fan of that saying, but now I believe we need to feel our emotions to get to a happy ending. That is how you find a support system. Let people ask questions and see if you need anything or are ok. We all need help. If you fake it, nobody ever knows something is wrong, which can be dangerous when we try to deal with everything on our own. Hiding or pretending is only an act. Work through it. You can’t get to that rainbow without any rain.
Find your passions, find a career you are happy in. Do not focus on just money, fame, success, or whatever you are after. Focus on why you love something. Allow yourself to fall or even fail. Get back up after, and breathe. You do not persevere without falling a few times before standing on your own two feet. If we just focus on one thing and forget the rest, we are going to be missing pieces to the puzzle.
The energy you put out into the universe is what you get back. Challenge your mind and way of thinking. Write quotes on index cards and take them with you everywhere until you memorize them in your head. Believe in yourself so others can. Not everything happens overnight.
When storms hit, ride them out.
Do not worry until you have to worry. Do not worry about what you are not able to control. Life has an odd way of working out that way. Everything happens for a reason.
Remember, we want to be happy with the people and things in our life…we do want to pressure on them to create our happiness or us. That job belongs to one person…YOU!
Be kind and love BIG!